Category: 100 Extraordinary Adventures

  • The Hardy Boys

    Extraordinary Adventure
    59

    It is the Hardy Boys books that first sparked my desire to read. And there were so many of them, that it took until my junior year in college before I finally finished the series and could read something else. The next book I found was something called “Ulysses,” and since it did not feature small time crooks, lost treasure, or hilarious Chet Morton fat jokes, I threw it away (maybe the fat jokes don’t show up until the second act).

    The Hardy Boys A Figure in Hiding
    Peeping Tom encounters were rare, but Frank and Joe never turned down a case.

    It is impossible to describe my love for the Hardy Boys mythology — which makes it an odd choice for a blog post. But I love the whole zany logic of the universe. Frank and Joe Hardy are brothers who are relatively interchangeable, except for their age and their hair color. Frank is always described as 18 and dark haired. Joe is 17 and blond. Always and for all time. Remember, Frank and Joe by now have starred in nearly 200 regular mysteris, 130 Case Files (more grown-up mysteries), a handful of Justice League-type books where they team up with Nancy Drew, and a collection of ghost stories. And that’s not even everything. Because I was a supremely nerdy child, I once went through the books in my collection, calculating the days spent on each case. Because their age never changed, I was certain the entire series could fit into one year. I’m sure the brothers share the same birthday, and Book 1 just happens to begin on the day after.

    I stopped calculating somewhere after 8 years.

    The Hardy Boys While the Clock Ticked
    This supremely creepy image still gets me. But at the same time, I'd love a hidden clock door.

    The brothers live in Bayport, a sleepy little coastal town, where they attend high school, date their girlfriends, and constantly reference Chet Morton’s bulging tummy (with affection). They are also always hot on the trail of thieves, smugglers, poachers, spies, outlaws, and assorted unsavory characters. Washington D.C. holds the current record for the city with the most crime in the U.S. I think it’s because they didn’t count Bayport. But in spite of the never-ending criminal proceedings, it’s a lovely town.

    The Hardy Boys are amateur supersleuths, following in the footsteps of their professional father. This means they don’t accept payment. Which is fine, since they are always uncovering stolen caches of money, lost jewels, or ancient buried treasure. Presumably they donate this to museums or sick relatives, since their means are modest.

    The Hardy Boys The Missing Chums
    The Hardy Boys were forever using words foreign to me like "Chums" and "Jalopy" and "Eatery"

    They live with both their parents and their spinster aunt Gertrude, who is always worried about them. And with good reason. I don’t think there has been a single book in the series where Frank or Joe doesn’t end up knocked out by a criminal who catches them “snooping.” If the NFL really wants to study the effect of concussions, they should take a look at the Hardy Boys. Apparently, concussions have no effect on people whatsoever, and in fact may actually improve your mental aptitude.

    Steve Young
    This explains Steve Young's budding success as a supersleuth

    The Hardy Boys give as good as they get. They are forever punching people in the solar plexus. The solar plexus is an area of the body that I have rarely heard mentioned outside the Hardy Boys books. But it is a magic spot that can render a criminal unconscious with a single blow. They don’t often use guns, but they both have their pilot’s license, play instruments, dominate sporting events, customize cars, perform Houdini-esque escape tricks, and are surprisingly good with animals. To young boys looking for a hero, you can’t get much more perfect than Frank and Joe.

    Forgive me a bit of self-promotion, but the Hardy Boys hold a special place in our hearts, having provided the inspiration for Johnny Socko, the teen supersleuth star of The Raiders of Castillo del Mar. Johnny embodies all the same characteristics, right down to the clean-cut, square dialogue of our favorite childhood heroes. The Raiders of Castillo del Mar is a loving tribute to those days spent lost in the library with Franklin W. Dixon and his only literary creation. There are several Hardy Boys references hidden in the book.

    My personal collection numbers well over a hundred titles, and I still have them, proudly displayed in my office, though many of them haven’t been read since my youth. They are among my most prized possessions.

    Next up.. #58!

     

  • The Lord of the Flies

    Extraordinary Adventure
    60

    The desert island: Perhaps the quintessential adventure setting. Used to it’s most famous effect in Daniel Dafoe’s Robinson Crusoe, which we discussed earlier, but only slightly less well known is William Shakespeare’s Magnum Opus The Tempest, featuring the evil Caliban, The mysterious Prospero and many more of the bard’s most inscrutable names. However The Tempest is not the adventure we wish to discuss either. No instead we are talking about probably the third most well-known desert island adventure and number 60 on our countdown. William Golding’s required sixth grade reading classic, The Lord of the Flies.

    This is William Golding. How he manages to build and distribute from his sleigh millions of toys to kids around the globe in just one night and still have time to be a prize winning novelist is a complete mystery.

    William Golding’s first novel, The Lord of the Flies, is what the critics call a “tour de force” which roughly translates to “a tour of force” and is probably more than an idiom than an actual description of anything. In this case the force is a group of private school students who wash up on shore after their plane has crashed. They make vague references to an unspecified nuclear war that had caused them to flee England to begin with so in that sense, and if you want to grasp completely at straws, you could say that The Lord of the Flies is Science Fiction.

    Fortunately that’s where the science ends and the fiction really takes off. The boys slowly begin to revert to animal paganism. When they first are deciding on who should be in charge, the two candidates are Ralph and Jack. Both are excellent leaders, but whereas one has a conscious, the other one completely spirals out of control and literally sets the island ablaze, probably because he was in the choir.

    This is right before Jack and his band of hunters go after Ralph Macchio dressed as a shower.

    I don’t want to spoil all the reversals so it’s best if you read it for yourself. Lord of the flies is often said by any number of English teachers to be an “allegory” for something. Also it was said that if you do not know what this allegory was, you would obtain a D minus in their class. Sigh. Such is the case with many assigned books. Teachers are often ruining them by handing out grades for reading them. However to placate my sixth grade English teacher, here is a quick run down of the various metaphors and their meanings:

    The character of Piggy: Clearly a metaphor for intellectualism. Like most intellectuals, Piggy is later robbed and murdered.

    Simon: a metaphor for spiritualism. Like many spiritual people Simon goes off by himself for days at a time and then comes back in the middle of the night just as your war dance is hitting it’s stride.

    The Conch Shell:  a metaphor for authority. Like all authority it is immediately abused and then smashed.

    And finally, The Lord of the Flies himself: It’s actually a pig’s head on a stick but is meant by Golding to symbolize “the beast,” the evil within all of us. Fittingly Simon, the most spiritual one on the island, is also the only one who understands his own author’s metaphors and promptly tries to warn everyone of their impending D minus if they do not listen to him. Simon sees the pig head swarming with flies and thus we have the title of the book: The Lord of the Flies.

    Despite all that, The Lord of the Flies, as depicted here, is actually kinda cute.

    Interestingly the name Lord of the Flies comes from the bible. It is the literal translation of the name Beelzebub, but Lord of the Flies is not without it’s Christ imagery either. William Golding was knighted and actually won the Nobel Prize for a later novel that nobody has heard of. Though in all likelihood it was to make up for missing him on this, his first go round. Among other things The Lord of the Flies is also the inspiration for Stephen King’s fictional town of Castle Rock, Maine. Castle Rock being the place on the island that the hunter kids called their headquarters.

    Next up … 59!